Mataaji Fe’s Story.
“I started to ask spiritual stuff when I was a teenager or probably when I was about your age. I have been asking a lot. Why is life unfair? Why are there people who were born pretty, rich, and smart. There are also people who were born poor, ugly and stupid. I have been asking spiritual leaders from our church but they kept on telling me ‘its life’s mystery’. That is too vague for me. Everything is vague that time. No one can answer my questions properly, intellectually and philosophically. I believe faith is nothing without philosophy. Vice Versa.
I’m not like this before… wearing a very conservative Sari, eating Vegetarian meals, and all this Hare Krishna thing. I used to be a designer. I wear really revealing clothes. I party all night. I socialize a lot especially with my fellow designers. But I feel empty inside.
Then one day, I saw some Hare Krishna devotees who were walking in our office. It felt really weird. The devotees look weird. They are weird, but they have peace in their faces. They look really happy. I want that kind of happiness. I believe Krsna prepared that day for me. There are no coincidences. Everything is predestined.
I was about to go to America that time to visit my parents. But because I want to learn more and because I want to devote myself in the service of Krsna, I cancelled my trip. My mom was furious. I just faked my reasons. I know it will be difficult for them to understand the path I just chose. I hid this new faith system of mine, but eventually they found out about it and understood what I just got myself in to. My mom started preparing veggie dishes for me because I am not a good cook. Thanks to Krsna.
I am now in peace…real peace which cannot be found outside or from any material stuff in this world. Only Krsna satisfies. I remember the bible verse about Jesus telling us that we should not worry about the food that we will eat because if the birds in the air have food to eat everyday, how much more for us? Jesus’ teachings in the Bible can also be found in the Bhagavad Gita, but the latter is deeper and specific. The 2 really work hand in hand.
Ok. So that’s my story. Hope you enjoyed it. Hahaha I really love talking. I told you, I grew up as a sociable person.”